Anshu Singh

For me, it depends upon whom am I talking to!

1. Father: All the questions are answered as “Yes” and “Okay”. Even if the answers are negative, otherwise he will be worried.

2. Boyfriend: All the questions are answered as “Yes” and “Okay”. Even if the answers are negative, same reason as above.

3. Thesis Supervisor: “ I have finished the codes, it is just that the output is not proper”. Which in reality means, I have not even started writing the codes.

4. Collaborator : “Yes Sir, I know how to proceed further” . But the truth is, I don’t have 0.1 % idea about the terms he has used.

5. Male Friends: “We will hang out next time” and that next time never comes.

Kanwal Anuvind

Girlfriend’s innocent lies which I can easily see through.

1. “I have to wake up early tomorrow.”
You want to watch the new episode of GOT.

2. “I am on a diet. Let’s eat at home.”
You are saving money to buy that new bag.

3. “I will be ready in five minutes.”
You said the same thing one hour ago.

4. “I promise I will not get mad.”
You chokeslammed me the last time you said this.

5. “I have nothing to wear.”
You bought the entire H&M, the last time we went shopping.

6. “I am not drunk.”
You just called that old cab driver Dumbledore.

7. “I am fine.”
You are planning a secret mission to take me down.

Oh boy, this is going to be fun.

Olivia July

1. You’re the best I’ve ever had.

2. You’re so BIG.

3. Of course I don’t care about your money.

4. I don’t know what I’d do without you.

5. Nothing is wrong. I’m fine.

6. He’s just a friend.

7. My mother likes you. You’re overreacting.

8. I love when you cook.

9. No, I don’t have an attitude because the toilet seat was up.

10. I love you.

Abida Jabeen

Some of these lies are in common practice in our culture

· Honey, I am not feeling well tonight!!!!! (means stay away!!)

· I swear I never touched your wallet.

· Your mom is so sweet.

· Everything is fine with your in laws.

· I was not checking your mobile phone.

· I dont have any money left for groceries.

· Our children are perfect in every way.

· You are the first man in my life.

· I have nothing to wear!!!!

· My age is less than what you guess.

Note: These are not always lies, yet these are the common lies which women use in different situations.

Image Credit: Alvin Rodriguez

Arundhati Bose

1.
Lie- “You got into a relationship? I am so happy for you!”
Reality- I am reconsidering my entire life right now because if you got a girlfriend then there’s something terribly, terribly wrong with this world.

2.
Lie- “I am a little busy right now, I will call you later”
Reality- If you are actually anticipating that call then you need to sort your life. For real.

3.
Lie- “I like your friends!”
Reality- Their offhand sexist jokes are NOT funny and I have killed your best friend thrice in my head.

4.
Lie- “I got no time to do my make up”
Reality- I spent 1 hour and 38 minutes trying to get this ‘natural look’.

5.
Lie- “Oh, you went to Goa last year? Nice”
Reality- Of course I know that. I have Instagram stalked you so terribly, I even know which biscuit your dog likes the best.

6.
Lie- “I don’t use slangs”
Reality- I call my best friend with such slangs that sometimes I forget what her name is.

7.
Lie- “Sorry, that was a drunk text”
Reality- I was as sober as Virgin Mary when I called you sexy, can you please, for once, get the goddamn hint?

Via Quora / Image Credit: