1.
interviewer: why do you want this job?
me: I’ve always been passionate about being able to afford food
@justinnlailai
2.
INTERVIEWER: any weaknesses?
ME: my strength
I: ?
ME: im physically very weak
I: oh. Any strengths?
ME: [i pick up his desk] im a great liar
@mynameisntdave
3.
Interviewer: do you have good organizational skills
Me: I’ve consolidated all my apps to a single homescreen
Interviewer: holy shit
@ksteeno
4.
interviewer: why do you want a job at my bakery?
me: i dont know. i just really knead the dough
@YhipShip
5.
Me on a job interview
@Lmao
6.
INTERVIEWER: do u have any questions for us
ME: a cat woud totaly own a cat but a dog woud never own a dog
INTERVIEWER: thatS not a question
@jonnysun
7.
[Petco]
INTERVIEWER: We’re looking for a real cat person.
ME: *slowly pushes paperwork off desk*
INTERVIEWER: holy shit
@CodyJP9412
8.
*Job Interview*
“Tell me about yourself”
*flashback to when I used to pull out USB drive without clicking safely eject*
“I’m risk taker”
@sarcastictroler
9.
interviewer: so what are your talents?
me: well i can clap at exactly the right time during the friends theme tune…
@FriendsComedy
10.
Interviewer: so, tell me a little bit about yourself
Me:
@SimsLogic
11.
Interviewer 1: Describe yourself in one word
Me: Hired
Interviewer 2:[whispers] Holy shit can she do that??
@River_Niles
12.
INTERVIEWER: Why should we hire you?
ME: I once pronounced “Worcestershire” correctly.
INTERVIEWER: Holy shit.
@dafloydsta
13.
interviewer: so why do you want this job?
me:
@MilanAryal
14.
INTERVIEWER: what makes you different?
ME: *begins levitating*
INTERVIEWER: holy shit
ME: *whispering to my pet chameleons* nice work guys
@notacroc
15.
INTERVIEWER: strengths?
ME: I’m good at presenting both sides of an argument
INTERVIEWER: great
ME: which could also be a weakness…
@panmidwest
16.
*at a job interview*
Them: so we found your Twitter accoun…
Me:
@officialjkizzle
17.
Interviewer: are you a risk taker?
Me: opens ex-instagram & likes a photo from 11 months ago
Interviewer: holy shit you are hired
@mo_is_funny
18.
During the job interview vs after you get the job
@MatthewACherry
19.
INTERVIEWER: Okay, do u have any questions/info for me?
ME: Did you know boobytrap spelled backwards is partyboob?
INTERVIEWER: holy shit
@TemmyExplicit
20.
male interviewer: do you have any special skills?
me: [removes my bra without taking my shirt off]
interviewer: holy shit you’re hired
@chillbears
21.
Job Interviewer: So, tell me what special skills you have.
Me:
@RespectfulMemes
22.
Interviewer: Says here you do magic tricks?
Me: *hands him back his business card* Is this your card?
Interviewer: holy shit
@RoshedeJaleel
23.
DOG: I think that job interview went well!
*looks in mirror and sees ear was inside-out the whole time* Son of a
@SirEviscerate
24.
INTERVIEWER: So can you tell me a little bit about yourself?
ME: My aunt used to live in paris…
@megankcomedy
25.
*walks into a job interview*
@MyFavsTrash
26.
Interviewer: what’s your greatest weakness?
Me: I’m vague
Interview: can you elaborate?
Me: yeah
@patmorrison22
27.
INTERVIEWER: would you say you’re independent?
ME: [looks at mom] [mom nods] i’d say so, yes
@FemaleStruggIes
28.
When the interviewer asks what you did at your last job
@FemalePains