1.
I hate “oomf” because i do not read it as “one of my followers” i read it as mario taking damage in mario 64
hyenasaur

2.
Very frustrated lady next to me at Gamestop: “My son Kevin wants Fork Knife for his birthday but no place has it in stock.”
me: I think it’s Fortnite.
Her: No. It’s definitely Fork Knife.
Sorry Kevin. I tried.
TheBloggess

3.
Ladies this is what real intimacy looks like

IllyBocean

4.
Give Eevee a Water Stone – Vaporeon
Give Eevee a Thunder Stone – Jolteon
Give Eevee a Fire Stone – Flareon
Give Eevee money to support their creative endeavors – Patreon
YumiScott

5.
Naming Link “my dude” turns everyone you meet into a very chill bro

JRBSFX

6.
dream game project:
youre a fat dog at a dinner party where all the guests have been told not to feed you.
you have to find the weakest people and psychologically torture them into giving you scraps by tail wagging, staring, and begging, w/ varying cuteness multipliers
BuffTuffKRuff

7.
Wario and Waluigi are inverse versions of Mario and Luigi, hence the “W” names – “M” upside down, or inverted. For this reason, the evil version of Peach would not be called “WaPeach,” but rather, “beach.” In this essay I will
CaseyNuge

8.
["guy who works at activision" voice] put eyeliner on the kangaroo. make the kangaroo’s waist tiny. no, tinier!! if the kangaroo isn’t wearing make-up, how will they know it’s a girl?! PUT A RED WIG ON THE FU*KING KANGAROO

instant_grat

9.
Gamestop looked me right in my face and told me my PS3 was worth $18
CerromeRussell

10.
Open-world RPG edition.

AtticusThomas

11.
The first week of Pokémon GO was probably the closest thing we’ll ever have to world peace
DudaBR_

12.
“Mom said it’s my turn to use the Xbox”

Genocide_City

13.
me: h-
mechanical keyboard owner: *CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK
CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK
CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK
CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK
CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK* “hi :)”
Fireflufferz

14.
me: what do you want for dinner?
date: how about sonic
me: [under breath] he’s so fast how would we catch him
NOTVIKING

15.
If you’re worse than me at video games you’re an uncoordinated dumbass. if you’re better than me at video games you’re a pathetic neckbeard. i’m exactly the right amount of good at video games.
bobby

16.
If video games have taught me anything, it’s that you’ll automatically get promoted if you kill your boss
meganamram

17.
why the fu*k do streamers buy those $400 gaming chairs that look like race car seats like what happens if u have a girl over one day n she sees it n asks if u race formula 1 cars or some sh*t like what are u supposed to say to that
mineifiwildout

18.
I am thou… thou art i…. the shadow of the true self

lusamine

19.
The show wife Swap but for gaming set ups
dril

20.
Remember in Mario Kart when you thought you were in first place? Then realized you were looking at the wrong screen and crashing into walls and sh*t..
That’s adulthood….
CrzyCharly

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