1. Home Alone
Biden: Ok here's the plan: have you seen Home Alone
— Dean E. S. Richard (@deanfortythree) November 11, 2016
Obama: Joe, no
Biden: Just one booby trap
Obama: Joe pic.twitter.com/IDTc2L1sKF
2. Tiny hands
Obama: Did you replace all the toiletries with travel size bottles?
— Josh Billinson (@jbillinson) November 11, 2016
Biden: He's got tiny hands Barack, I want him to feel welcome here pic.twitter.com/e7NRIZ43Ww
3. Whoopee cushions
Biden: can i put whoopee cushions under all the chairs before he gets here
— rudy mustang (@roostermustache) November 11, 2016
Obama: joe im on the phone
Biden:*muttering* u didnt say not to pic.twitter.com/qfjh3ffkPE
4. Hide-‘n’-go Biden
Biden: Oh boy, his car is here, quick let's all hide
— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) November 10, 2016
Obama: Joe pls pic.twitter.com/w0pqxcaS9A
5. Lego dumps
Joe: Okay so we sneak in one night around February, steal his shoes
— War on Goatmas (@jacquelinehey) November 13, 2016
Obama: Joe
Joe: And then dump legos all over the floor pic.twitter.com/2KCU7LbciV
6. Classic jokes
— Joe Biden (@JokerJoeBiden) November 19, 2016
7. Pens
Joe: I hid all the pens from Trump
— The Hashtagonist (@TheHashtag0nist) November 12, 2016
Obama: Why?
Joe: Because he bringing his own.
Obama: ???
Joe: HE'S BRINGING HIS OWN PENCE pic.twitter.com/uni3WUd4X3
8. January 21st
Obama: Check pl-
— Josh Billinson (@jbillinson) November 12, 2016
Biden: Actually, we'll take five more milkshakes and you can bill the White House on January 21st pic.twitter.com/KVcdBtQHAe
9. Pixar in real life
Biden: I feel like we should do something for him. He seems lonely.
— The Glad Stork (@TheGladStork) November 15, 2016
Obama: For the last time, Joe. Bernie Sanders is not the guy from Up. pic.twitter.com/YTnSo3mIMx
10. Battery problems
Joe: "What if we take batteries out of all of the remotes before we leave"
— MistyKnightsTwistOut (@Steph_I_Will) November 11, 2016
Barack:" Joe we can't-"
Joe: "Or we could cut all the cords" pic.twitter.com/SHrCkr8ZPs
11. Joe calls 911
this is one of my favorites. pic.twitter.com/uKFJsQSuPK
— deray mckesson (@deray) November 18, 2016
12. Wi-Fi password
Biden: I'm not giving them the wifi password
— JAY (@pieceofjay) November 11, 2016
Obama: Joe…
Biden: I said what I said pic.twitter.com/l17SaIeQke
13. The purple one
Obama: Excuse me waiter, can we change the toy from the kids meal?
— Barack Biden (@ObamaBidenConvo) December 5, 2016
Biden: *whispers* not the purple one
Obama: NOT THE PURPLE ONE PLEASE pic.twitter.com/1TplcAaPHr
14. How to defeat ISIS
Obama: any good ideas in how to defeat isis?
— Barack & Joe (@Barack_and_Joe) November 13, 2016
*Biden raises hand*
Obama: besides assembling the Avengers?
*Biden lowers hand* pic.twitter.com/GzkXoJcGg6
15. Joe’s vacation
Biden: and this is when we went zip lining. Michelle said I was brave. I was scared tho pic.twitter.com/rYRVWf2NPs
— Barack & Joe (@bidenandobama) November 12, 2016
16. Roll with it
Obama: "Joe, why are you still holding my hand?"
— thomas moore (@Thomas_A_Moore) November 12, 2016
Biden: "I wanna freak Mike Pence out"
Obama: "But why?"
Biden: "Just roll with it" pic.twitter.com/o5KZZ0Ysgz
17. Powdering noses
Biden: *whispers* I left a bag of Cheetos in the bathroom.
— Barack & Joe (@Barack_and_Joe) November 15, 2016
Obama: Why?
Biden: in case he needs to powder his nose.
Obama: Joe…. pic.twitter.com/GQPxwBuSTj
18. And bros for life
Obama:tell the world were bros
— Mitchie (@kylhoerenn) March 28, 2016
Biden:*whispers* were bros
Obama:bro why'd u whisper
Biden:ur my world bro
Obama:bro pic.twitter.com/buCUU3nSI2
19. Night Hawk
Secretary: Mr Biden?
— Barack & Joe (@Barack_and_Joe) November 14, 2016
Biden:….
Secretary: *Sigh*… Night Hawk
Biden: What is it Martha? pic.twitter.com/06WWKsMe0c
20. Ice Cream Joe
Biden: Like heck am I leaving him any ice cream, Barack here take a cone
— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) November 11, 2016
Obama: Joe you know I'm lactose into-
Biden: Like. Heck. pic.twitter.com/zXGOTS2pNs
21. Sandwiches
Joe: I'm going to ask Donald if he wants something to eat
— Jill Biden (@JillBidenVeep) November 13, 2016
Barack: That's nice, Joe
Joe: And then I'm going to offer him knuckle sandwiches pic.twitter.com/xYJ0k2QTX6
22. Leo and Barack
If you could just tell Joe that Inception wasn't a documentary I think we could all get some sleep tonight. pic.twitter.com/zGjHwhLurm
— Barack & Joe (@bidenandobama) November 13, 2016
23. Biden vs. Biden
Biden: I'll be fine living on my own. I don't need Barack.
— Barack Biden (@ObamaBidenConvo) November 29, 2016
Biden to Biden: Tell him your pregnant with his child. pic.twitter.com/7FpWUhjNk9
24. Horcruxes
Biden: I'm gonna throw his wig into the fireplace.
— Lindsey (@HobbitLindsey) November 15, 2016
Obama: Joe, don't.
Biden: One horcrux down, 6 to go. pic.twitter.com/Y0CBfXen5t
25. Laser pens
Obama: *whispers* put the laser pointer away or give it to me pic.twitter.com/N3zLGdYk7j
— jason dot gov (@jasondotgov) November 12, 2016