1.
I told my mom she was invading my privacy and she told me I came out of her privacy pic.twitter.com/VtRy3bHYaY
— The Worst One (@mfuntoyi) July 22, 2017
2.
Wife had a bunch of rum drinks tonight and we somehow ended up at Target pic.twitter.com/kM0OxcA7No
— Bottlerocket (@bottlerocket) July 26, 2017
3.
so my auntie bought this so my cousins head wouldn't be rolling around on the road and this is what happened pic.twitter.com/06nl2X3REi
— celeste (@Honey1celeste) July 29, 2017
4.
If Shania Twain saying "let's go girls" doesn't flip some internal switch in you, you're lying.
— Morgan Littlebear (@__meowgan) July 22, 2017
5.
"Wow 3 tattoos.. those are pretty permanent you know"
— Emily Barry (@EmiBarry) July 26, 2017
Me: wow 3 kids… those are pretty damn permanent CAROL
6.
wife: I am having an affair
— y.a.b.k.a.t (@ohen39) July 20, 2017
me: *handing menu back to waiter* I'll have the affair as well
7.
Congratulations to the happy couple! pic.twitter.com/sVQyAv7GOb
— Tettra™ @FM? (@tettracat) July 29, 2017
8.
my mom yesterday: do u work tomorrow
— Semra (@SemraDurmisevic) July 15, 2017
me: yes
my mom today: do u work today
me: yes i already told u
my mom when i'm at work: where are u
9.
my mother was giggling at this and told me to "take a look at that adorable dachshund, he's sleeping", she was looking at a purse: pic.twitter.com/ZyNKaLMxKI
— Hannah Murphy (@dumb_hannah) July 30, 2017
10.
Thanks for the clarification, Dad. pic.twitter.com/Y2ulMh7sJV
— Ray (@rayy_baybay) July 21, 2017
11.
Riley, you're a genius. pic.twitter.com/Lp3VAf7C2Q
— Joel Willans (@Joelwillans) July 30, 2017
12.
One of my students got sick of the rest of the class and started meditating pic.twitter.com/wXpmlNz6Ql
— Uncle Mac (@__McDonald) July 18, 2017
13.
Gaia, NO! pic.twitter.com/MR7yIyp70V
— niy(@bbygirlniy) July 31, 2017
14.
my mom is so extra pic.twitter.com/f2y34a5d6X
— young gunner (@xhaileysmith) July 19, 2017
15.
My mom was playing racket ball and ended up throwing her back out trying to show off pic.twitter.com/hvWbJdYozZ
— b. sumz (@bklynsummers) July 18, 2017
16.
if there is a better stock photo narrative i haven't seen it. pic.twitter.com/r8nCIHD9ZU
— rob dobi (@Robdobi) July 19, 2017
17.
Presumably good at helping people stay alive. pic.twitter.com/xvj0jF3lJh
— Andrew Dennison (@CharlieBeatnik) July 14, 2017
18.
my mom asked me for a pic of ed sheeran and i tried to be funny and i edited it i didnt know she was gonna frame it a week later jfc pic.twitter.com/uFNzgnztaF
— goth turtle (@dubstep4dads) July 13, 2017
19.
My mom used the dominos app for the first time and forgot to get sauce and cheese. Dead pic.twitter.com/cAhd1ymMsg
— bj stead (@whosrobertseed) July 7, 2017
20.
bruh pic.twitter.com/cZipzS80rL
— valentina!! (@visionarez) July 13, 2017
21.
I sent my husband grocery shopping earlier (with a list) and it stressed him out so bad pic.twitter.com/KkGLznR3IW
— OG (@Trillary_Banks) July 5, 2017
22.
My daughter was chasing my son around with a lightsaber and got a little too into it….. pic.twitter.com/LN6ewwqqCS
— Princess Di(@MommaSmarsh) July 6, 2017