1.
Me: I’m definitely over him
Wine: No
@mdob11
2.
Guests: I brought you some non-alcoholic wine
Me: oh excellent *pours it down the sink without breaking eye contact*
@DaddyJew
3.
*sits on my balcony overlooking the french countryside, sipping $15,000 wine from a 7-foot crazy straw*
shinkoukei
4.
Me at a wine tasting:
*swirls glass*
*sniffs*
*sips slowly*
*stares off into the distance*
…Ah, yes. This is in fact wine.
@ThoughtOtter
5.
*snifts wine* do i detect a hint of grapes?
snifts
jncos
6.
I have seen the future and it is bright.
pill-barista
7.
Me, bewildered: “What is this odd thingy?”
H: It’s called a wine stopper.
Me, whisper cries: “Why would anyone want to stop the wine?”
@Marlebean
8.
[ordering wine while on date]
do you like merlot, tammy?
“yeah but you don’t pronounce the T”
ok *looks at waiter* 2 merlot for me and ammy
@murrman5
9.
Me: can I get a glass of wine please?
Employee: sir this is McDonalds
Me: oh fuck I am so sorry… Can I get a McWine?
homoboyfriend
10.
contourkit
11.
Trying to find the cheapest wine with the highest alcohol percentage
@CGBPosts
12.
brandonflowersfakeassteeth
13.
my uncle and aunt were arguing over who had to drive home then we heard my aunt say “babe look” and she started chugging a bottle of wine scientifrick
im the aunt lordjoshbass
15.
me whenever i drink something from a wine glass
heycravings
16.
So much of being an adult is bringing a bottle of wine someone brought to your house to someone else’s house
@eaxford
17.
budgeting tip buy all of your bedding in the same color as the wine you drink in bed
@sbellelauren
18.
*fully embraces wine mom culture at age 19*
wave94
20.
Ahhh yes of course, I adore wine. I especially love [looks down at bottle of Pinot Grigio] peanut Gregorio
@sageboggs
21.
If I did one of those wine and paint nights the instructor would be like wow look at you, you are really good at wine.
@Stellacopter