#1 You can’t leave a toddler alone for even a second:

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#2 And you really can’t leave them alone with a cooling cake:

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#3 Toddlers have zero respect for your personal space during the day:

Mom of toddlers pic.twitter.com/GwtTOFjnhL

— karenwazenb (@KarenWazen) July 25, 2019

#4 And even less respect when you’re trying to sleep:

Gnight!
Let sleep land on you like an early morning toddler kick
Dream BIG pic.twitter.com/I5DgERJD6e

— Evil-Lyn Manuel Miranda (@Lin_Manuel) July 13, 2019

#5 Doing normal things, like trying on clothes, become decidedly less normal with a toddler:

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#6 And if you thought having a toddler would help you with a new baby, you’re wrong:

Ostrantula / Via reddit.com

#7 You’ll find yourself coming up with solutions for toddler-created problems that would seem 100% crazy before you had a toddler:

the problem: my daughter won’t stop climbing on the fireplace.

observation: my daughter hates Elmo.

solution: I made a toddler scarecrow. pic.twitter.com/JvAWUyQcch

— Oops!…I Dad It Again (@NewDadNotes) July 2, 2019

#8 And these solutions are ones non-parents will not understand…at all:

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#9 Eventually you won’t even know what the heck you’re doing (like this parent who used this “bookmark”):

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#10 Going to the bathroom in peace is a thing of the past:

I have been in the bathroom for a total of 4 minutes…and in that 4 minutes somehow every cast member of the Paw Patrol and at least 10 crayons have been delivered to me by my 2 year old and now she is doing my hair. #Toddlers #IJustWantedToPeeInPeace pic.twitter.com/3WCDvJXohG

— Audra McDonald (@AudraEqualityMc) September 10, 2019

#11 And traveling is 1000x harder:

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#12 Why? Because toddlers are 100% irrational:

Toddlers when you take away the crisps they've been eating for the past 3 hours pic.twitter.com/eCG1CIxa6I

— ser (@libaants) April 24, 2019

#13 And even when they try to do something nice — like make you breakfast — it’s a whole thing:

Yes, the toddler tried to make their parent a hearty bowl of coffee grinds.
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#14 But things get even wilder when toddlers start talking, because toddlers are absolutely savage:

I’m getting my hair dyed right now and I’m scared my toddler is gonna fry me when he sees it. I never know with him. He was calling me Mommy Cowboy for a week last Fall because of some boots I was wearing. pic.twitter.com/13a2U5Nl8X

— Parenthood Activate! 10/16/2019 (@Steph_I_Will) September 5, 2019

#15 Basically, they don’t care about you and your feelings:

My 3 year old asked how long he had to wait until he could stop listening to me. I told him he had to listen to me for the rest of his life. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "I'll listen to you for the rest of YOUR life." Toddlers are cold-blooded, man.

— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) August 19, 2019

#16 And they’ll turn on you on a dime:

Nobody:

Toddler: You are not my friend anymore.

— Asia (@AsiaChloeBrown) February 7, 2019

#17 Even worse, they say things that make you afraid to take them in public:

My toddler keeps referring to her vagina as her "frontbutt"…… pic.twitter.com/27tj98n3ya

— Daddy. (@N9_L5) January 25, 2019

#18 And they say things that make you afraid to be alone with them at home:

during bedtime the toddler announced there is a second "purple mommy" who appears at night someone help pls help

— Chantal Braganza (@chantalbraganza) January 7, 2019

#19 Long story short, parents, this:

chief_bighorse / Via reddit.com

Via BuzzFeed, Preview photo credit: KarenWazen / twitter.com, Ostrantula / reddit.com