1.
[leaving for work]
*gives wife a quick kiss*
*spends 10 minutes saying bye to the dog*
@iwearaonesie
2.
[jumps in Uber]
ME: HURRY I’M LATE
UBER: [starts driving]
ME: PULL OVER HERE
[jumps out, pets dog]
ME: [jumps back in] GO GO GO
@Reverend_Scott
3.
[me passing literally any dog] wow there it is,, the world’s best dog
@imteddybless
4.
[1st date]
Maybe next time i could meet your dog
[2nd date]
Your dog is so cool
[3rd date]
Do u mind if me & your dog hung out without you
@LaziestCanine
5.
when you see a dog across the street and it’s crossing and walking towards you
@FreddyAmazin
6.
wife: “no one will remember dont worry”
me: “ok”
[2 mins into my high school reunion]
guy: “yo are you the dude that brought a dog to prom?”
@KeetPotato
7.
what do you call a friend that doesn’t like dogs?
you don’t
@Reverend_Scott
8.
nice dog. Sure would be a shame if someone were to…pet it for like 40 minutes
@Fred_Delicious
9.
I always wanna go up to ppl’s dogs & say “OMG I’m such a huge fan of your work. I’ve been following it since over there.” *points 7 ft away*
@aparnapkin
10.
This is the first good thing I’ve ever seen in the moments tab
@mattytalks
11.
[wakes up from 45 year coma]
Me: my dog better not be dead
@david8hughes
12.
My parents’ dog is getting the functional childhood I never had.
@ValeeGrrl
13.
No you can’t sit there my dog might sit there.
@buhsbaby_baby
14.
I wish there was a way to keep in touch with dogs I meet outside of grocery stores.
@primawesome
15.
Me: This has been the worst day. Nothing can fix this.
*dog climbs on sofa, puts head in my lap*
M: I have never been happier in my life.
@Tmoney68
16.
Just heard a guy at the dog park tell his dog “NO!” and then more quietly, “We talked about this!”
@NicCageMatch
17.
Someone peed here
Someone peed here
Someone peed here
Someone peed here
Someone peed here
Someone peed here
My dog when we go for a walk.
@thatUPSdude
18.
When you’re at a party and the dog comes downstairs
@nickpryce4
19.
dog:
me: i would die for you
@existentiaIly