1. Keep it simple.
“Where do babies come from?”
“Jamaica”
- and people act like parenting is hard or whatever
@Mandama004
2. Answer their question with a question.
The Kidlet asked me where babies come from. I asked her how to get to Sesame Street. And now we stare at each other.
@stonecypherent
3. Hit ‘em with the alternative facts.
My son found some handcuffs under our bed so I had to have “the talk” today…
I’m an international crime fighter now
pittdave13
4. Shipping is free with Prime.
Sarah – “Dad, where do babies come from?”
Me – “Amazon”
Sarah – thinking for a while… “OK”
@realhardman
5. Whoa. Way harsh. (True, but harsh.)
“Dad where do babies come from?”
“Some say a swirling hell portal on the outskirts of town. Others, from the bottom of a mystic lake”
@pleatedjeans
6. Let sperm swimming to the sounds of The Beach Boys do the heavy lifting.
4 year old: “Mama, where do babies come from?”
Me: “OK, I think it’s time to watch Look Who’s Talking.”
Mumface
7.
milennial dad sitting down to give his kid The Talk: son, I think it’s time you learned about the eggplant emojis and the peach emojis
@monstercoached
8. Keep your phone out of reach.
Siri, where do babies come from?
Me half awake in the kitchen: Nooooooooooooooo!!! God noooooooooooo!
- Mom life
@momgosomething
9. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Karson just asked me where babies come from. Long story short he now thinks if you kiss a girl you get a baby.
@emmyluuwho
10. A little misdirection never hurt.
[GAY PARENTING]
Son: where do babies come from
Me: ask your mother
Son:
Me:
Me: shit.
Feiqn
11. Find out what they know.
Z: where do babies come from? Me:where do you think? Z: moms butts
@mombearpig
12. Plan in advance.
parenting style: hide babies all over house
when kid asks where babies come from I’ll yell “WHERE DONT THEY COME FROM” & open every cabinet
@JoshEboy
13. Don’t worry about reality.
I never thought I’d have to give “the talk” to a kid, let alone have it end with “So, wait, birds mate by putting their butts together!?”
@thatdogoverther
14.
Kid: Dad, where do babies come from?
Harry: I feel very lucky to have worked on this project with your mother.
Traumatize them.
15. Create a diversion.
*At lunch with Nate*
N- mom, plz pass the fries
N- oh and where do babies come from?
Me- do you want a milkshake?!
Another parenting win
@Mellion